Sun, Jul. 27th, 2008, 05:06 pm
The bar exam is dumb. I want to put my face in a meat slicer.
The only city I've every lived in where the banks all close at 4:00.
Running a bank from 9-5 is dumb enough since everyone who might be interested in giving a bank their money is working during precisely those hours, but why 4:00? That forecloses even the option of leaving work early.
Banks could take this trend to its logical conclusion and only open during lunch hour, since that's the only time 9-5 workers can possibly make it, but then that raises the issue of when bank tellers are supposed to eat. 11:00 is way too early, and waiting until 1:00 could induce money-counting-impairing hypoglycemia.
Tue, Jun. 17th, 2008, 03:35 pm
It's kind of embarrassing how much I was looking forward to the release of firefox 3. After 10 seconds of using it I switched back to firefox 2. How can anyone stand the new location bar? If I type in "gm" it's because I want to go to "gmail.com" not because I want to revisit some AP article about general motors I glanced at for a moment 4 weeks ago. It's too bad, because the memory usage of 3 is better and page rendering noticeably faster.
Normally I'm willing to give "progress" a chance, but the new location bar is so contrary to my internet-browsin habits that I can't imagine ever making the upgrade. Switching to IE would be awful enough, but if they take their location bar the same route then what will I do? Spend time outside
It's not that I can't see how an autocomplete-type search of your browser history is useful, but that's a completely separte function than URL autocomplete, not a replacement for it. The ideal fix would be an addon allowing you to toggle between the two.
If you're reading this, are you using firefox 3? If yes, why doesn't this bother you?
Sun, Jun. 8th, 2008, 08:55 pm
I don't have a paid account, so I can't embed an LJ poll, but I want some internet-people advice. It's just 3 multiple choice questions
. Click that link or the photo above. Not that I'm procreating or anything...
And no, this isn't for an college journalism project.
Mon, Jun. 2nd, 2008, 02:47 pm
Dr. Allan Friedman, "the top neurosurgeon at Duke [University Medical Center] and an internationally known tumor and vascular surgeon," just removed Ted Kennedy's brain tumor
. After surgery, the doctor released the following statement:
"I am pleased to report that Senator Kennedy's surgery was successful and accomplished our goals. Senator Kennedy was awake during the resection, and should therefore experience no permanent neurological affects from the surgery."
Ordinarily, I'd let this kind of nitpicky grammar thing slide, but I'd like to see more attention to detail from my brain surgeon.
Wed, May. 7th, 2008, 01:19 am
I've come to realize that I, unlike all you internet dolts, have my finger planted firmly on the throbbing pulse of the bleeding edge of the humor zeitgeist. So let me take a moment to remind everyone of some things that, despite their reputation to the contrary, aren't actually funny.
- zombies-stopped being funny at least 3 years ago, probably around the same time the guy who wrote the "zombie survival guide" purchased a private island and a malaysian child slave with the proceeds of his book sales. Definitely stopped being funny as soon as the globe ran a positive story about a zombie march. Zombie movies are still inoffensive, but zombie pop culture references have lost all humor value and can now best be described as "kooky in a tedious, predictable kind of way." It should be noted that referring to something as "kooky"--even a joke--is not particularly complimentary to begin with.
- pirates-stopped being funny in 1999. Around this time there was a "pirate punk" subculture, complete with joke punk bands with names like "Scurvy," pirate imagery incorporated into critical mass flyers, and masses of dirty kids telling jokes like "where do pirates go to study? The librARRRy." It was funny for a minute, then everyone got tired of it. Tragically, the rest of the world was never informed. This is also "kooky in a tedious, predictable kind of way."
- robots-see items 1 and 2 above
- this one will make me no friends, but cat macros, are no longer funny. Sorry, it's true.
- hair question- Don't get me wrong, I think the mooninite guys did absolutely nothing wrong and were the victims of a massive overreaction on the part of a city run by clueless, small-minded, paranoid demagogues who were too proud to admit a mistake and instead decided their best course of action was to emperor-has-no-clothes a couple guys into a wholly unnecessary legal hassle, but the hair question press conference wasn't particularly funny. Admittedly, I'd be tempted to pull off something similar if I was in their position, and it would probably be just as awkward and poorly executed as their own performance was. And I admire their pluck. But none of this changes the fact that the press conference did not actually elicit "EPIC LULZ" and neither did the repeated "hair question" references on boston-related message boards. It really really really isn't funny when people are still doing it a year and a half later.
- irony- it's just exhausting. I would gladly exchange my ironic detachment and the dissolute-hipster-chic that drives all the girls wild for the ability to occasionally react to the world with genuine concern or emotion. Sure, I'm emotionally stunted and consider the world devoid of meaning, but at least I'm compelled against my will to respond to absolutely anything I experience with a reflexive, superficial sarcastic comment. Surely, that's worth something, right?
- the concept of snark itself- it used to be, in the old days, snark was the domain of jaded, bitter, losers who were smarter than everyone else and thought there were even smarter than that. No matter how much netizens refer to what they're doing as snarking, if they aren't angry, marginalized, and capable of at least occassionally being clever, it doesn't count as snark. Snark from the naively optimistic is as snarky as the song "Cop Killer" as performed by Betty White would be threatening
That is all.
Thu, Mar. 27th, 2008, 01:20 am
even if you hate the music, it's worth it for the retro cheese and the commercials.